Paint brush……….

I keep my paint brush with me
Wherever I may go,
In case I need to cover up
So the real me doesn’t show.
I am so afraid to show you me,
Afraid of what you’ll do- that
You might laugh or say mean things.
I am afraid I might loose you.
I would like to remove all my paint coats
To show you the real me, true me,
But I want you to try and understand,
I need you to accept what you see.
So if you’ll be patient and close your eyes,
I’ll strip off all my coats real slow.
Please understand how much it hurts
To let the real me show.
Now my coats are all stripped off.
I feel naked, bare and cold,
And if you still love me with all that you see,
You are me friend, pure as gold.
I need to save my paint brush, though,
And hold it in my hand,
And I want to keep it handy
In case somebody doesn’t understand.
So please protect me, my dear friend
And thanks for loving me true,
But please let me keep my paint brush with me
Until I love me, too.

i fear .................

I fear smiling to you, my beloved,
Because you would just know, its fake.

I fear crying to you, my beloved,
Because then you might get drowned in the never ending sorrow.

I fear keeping alighted in me, a hope,
Because these flames around suffocate me.

I fear expecting dreams to be realities,
Because cruelty lingers around, which can kill me on bed………….

I fear the fear that creeps in my mind,
Because the broken pieces are sailing, they are nowhere to meet.

I miss myself, the one who used to kiss her in the mirror,
Today I shy away from my eyes, because the mirror knows my realities.

I fear people noticing me……..
Because then I’ll be scrutinized for being me.

I fear light, my beloved,
Because the only reason, darkness applies to me, to all my days and nights.

I fear being confident on road,
Because the walks have learned to be alone, sharp throws and hurt prone.

I fear my fear of being so fearful
Because I was proud for being bold to fears.

From where have all these made a place into me………..?

Evergreen road of life!

Evergreen is the road of life!


When life starts betraying,
And people go slaying your feelings,
Not understanding your heart,
They avoid your eyes and from you they move apart.
You feel left alone, all your emotions abort, falls a tear from your eye, expressing your grieved heart……………….
Whose music only you can hear.

When nothing feels soothing, time seems looting all the mirth…..
When only loneliness is in your shirt, mind sunk below in dark.
When there's no visible way to walk-
The wind is killing, even nature disturbing,
Movement of butterfly is no more thrilling.
The ears are collapsed, tears still marking their presence,
At times I‘ve asked why has been the life so unfair to me…..
And there is none to answer back…….
The GOD seems bad and soul a burden…….
And is useless the truthful turban of love and care,
That you wore as a ceremony for others.
Rise up ,move your head towards the sky,
And see the beautiful evening sunshine….and birds that fly……
It says to you…life is full of colors, the purity and divine status…..that can make you feel nearer to the FATHER……..
Never quit the hope to live,
Bear the flame in you of the trust and confidence,
That,
After every dawn is a coming dusk, every tear is a smile,
And after every single step are miles, that you need to walk on,
On the never ending, evergreen road of life!

YOU EXSIST IN ME!

who taught me to fly!

destiny floats over the horizon,
and fate seems to swim across the seas.
i glide in the sky, with wings offered to me!

you'll be here today! i feel,
i've been led to meet,
are u fiction or the trend of peace.

i flied through seasons,
setting-soughting-repeating reasons.
i am a fool to look for u out there,
you are the door opened after the first closed.
you 've made me from what i was into what i am.
when you' rn't with me, the picture goes wrong.

you enchant, gide and protect,
you are a cosmic smile to my fears,
a golden coincidence to melt my doubts.

we'll walk through , full of past , present and future,
we'll be each other.

every step i take is one step closer on a bridge we must cross to meet.
before it gets too long please!

share my prejudice and my passion,
tolerate my skimpy fashion!
i've a wish and power to make it true.

to bring anything into your life, imagine that it's already there,
so you will find your existance in me.
my glory mirror with flawless reflection.

i will........i surely will!

I cry , I kill
At times I am full, at times I am nil.

I smile , I bare
I am unique , I am rare.

I think, I reject!
When will they understand , I am NO object.

I plan, I fail,
With heavy shackles , poorly I trail.

I sleep, I glare
On the suffering ends are my flairs.

I hope, I distrust
I don’t find sandpapers to clear off the dead rust.

I walk , I don’t move
Out of efforts, still punching to prove.

I repent, I commit,
Successes and failures to HIM I submit.

I desire change, but I live the same
Then I wail, for people’s dirty games.........

I try , but I don’t act
Materialism is using me- is a fact!

I attend then pretend,
My worthiness, I myself suspend…………..

I enjoy, I sail
With my realistic trials, I am pale!

I can , I wouldn’t
I can’t but I will,

Rise up and see the sun of my will……….
In the mill of filling nil’s.

I love my life,
With all it’s knives.
With smiles and shares,
Sheer fragile tears.

YOU BE MY BELOVED!!

Why the wind is so quiet; sky so silent!
Why stars are so dim; moon without rim!
The breath of the wind is moist as if a loved one of mine cried.
A heart is in pain, making me insane, where are you? My beloved.
Pleasurable is the noise of silence, but your whispering is desired,
I have been waiting for you for long, my eyes are now tired.
I felt your pain; it came to me with rain.
Give your hand I want to hold, I save your love it won't be sold.
The devilish night is devoid of mercy,
The luxurious disturbance is lusty,
The pulp of softest dew, is how I feel when with you,
Frenetic calamity is disposing me to fantasize your fantasy
But,
Why do I sense you in pain?
It's something within you, you need to share,
Your monotony is grievous to bare.
My beloved speak to me; to hear to you I am on lease.
Release the tempestuous doubts you have, bury your loneliness; I promise to be with you.
Don't walk away, I am talking to you, look into my eyes they are yearning for your look.
I am ready to share your pain, and take your tears,
I waited just for you all these years.
I can't promise to dream your dreams,
But will always pray to my supreme,
That, even if I don't be a part of them, may they be fulfilled,
It's your happiness I seek………. For your life.
I love you pure; I wish I could be the cure, to your sufferings,
I hoped to be your strength; I wish my love could be your purple robe.
Hope ……never dies so would mine live till I die!
To always see you smiling, and throw away your miseries, to me.
My golden angels will guard you, as you are my BELOVED!!

THE UNHEARD TRUTH:

I AM not this! I am not this!
shouted the real me!
but the reel world wasn't glee,
on my desire to be the selfless me!

I want to be greedy,
but for others and not for me.
I want to break the shackles that hold me tight,
that hold me back from doing what I feel is absolutely right!
I am alone within a millions to fight…..
where the truth of my heart is out of sight.
the seeds of selfish greed, I want to resist their breed in me.
I want my eyes to be the mirror of acceptation, only obscenity to face rejection.
I want to see GOD'S reflection, in every living being.

I want to forward my hand to those:
who are looked down upon! [ Hit the most by adversities
I have a dream for disappearance of disparities to be summoned.
I suffer the monotonous glow, of the fake worldly blows,
the roads unseen and paths unwilled…….
wait for a stroller to know, the freshness of its way.]
I have a dream for vanishing act of disparities to be summoned.

I desire to be an individual, to be free from cruel social rituals;
I want the world to see the beautiful me.

The purity is unseen; the rhythm of life is unheard,
Bitter is the taste of life's curd;
The dusty eyes see the dust first,
The feelingless emotions are just lust!

The colorful patches of life are black and white;
With a silver string I am a transparent kite.

The minimal prejudice is to be thrown;
The adjacent power of love to be grown,
The enchanting wind and murmuring spring
With the finest ting's,to fill the life with treasure of pleasure.
The missing blocks are to be made,
Have to rescue the neck on _______ spade,
I want to be powerful like a poisonous jade,
To thy feet my life is laid.

With every change I loose a part of me; the very young life wants to be enjoyed as a ride on a cart,
Want to burst the bubble of jealousy in me.

Life is always on a run;
Realities take abrupt turns;
Repeated mistakes help you learn;
Why do the memories stay; the painful ones should get burned.

At times life is an unfair and unjust,
At times the instincts of self are difficult to trust
I wish I could I know what I am looking for
So that I know what I have in me to adore.

I wish to speak the never heard truth about self,
Which are sleeping in me in golden graves!
I wish to carve the sculptures that are superbly plain……..

The unheard truths are waiting…..waiting from long to be heard!